“Charity sees the need, not the cause.” This is an old German proverb. Charity has great validity at this time of year. This is a time when we think about giving. We think about giving gifts to our children, friends and family.  Somehow this giving at Christmas has turned into sort of a feeling of obligation.  It feels like we should or have to give everyone a gift. That is not the spirit in which meaningful gift giving should be done.

Giving has two parts: the giver and the receiver. Both get benefit. The receiver gets the gift and the feeling of gratitude that someone cares about them. The receiver should graciously accept the gift.  Because of low self-esteem, many of us find it difficult to receive. Learn to just say, “Thank you so much.”  The giver gets the good feeling of gratitude that they had the ability to give. This feeling has been called “The Joy of Giving”.

The size of a gift is not as important as the thoughts behind it. Most of us think Love is a thing. That it is a noun. But really Love is a verb. When you love someone or give a gift with love to someone, you are giving them your energy, your love, your healing, your hope that the receiver will find benefit in the gift. You are sharing a part of yourself with them. It is much like when grandma made bread or soup; there was more present than just food, there was love in the food. There was an emotional, spiritual nutrient that was amazing. This year when you give, put love into the gift. The recipient will feel that and enjoy the gift more.

If you can, this year, give to someone you do not know. Charity is not just giving money to good causes. Charity is having a heart that’s ready to give, not just money, but time, support, food, expertise, a helping hand without judgment about why. Teach someone something. Share your wisdom. Give your smile. Extend your kindness. Help someone. Shovel a walk for someone who cannot. Scrape the ice off someone’s car. Pay someone’s fuel bill.

When you do this, do not tell anyone else. Savor the joy inside yourself. Make that gift to yourself. Be anonymous. Keep it just between you and God. Your own joy and gratitude will increase. This will change your inner chemistry. It will improve your health physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

I have a patient who is disabled and cannot work due to chronic low back pain.  He was very depressed with his situation. Rather than prescribe an anti-depressant, I suggested he volunteer somewhere. Now he spends a few hours each week helping clean a church and work in their food pantry. His depression has lifted. He is giving. He is give joy to others. He feels productive. He can see his accomplishment. He has increased his self-worth by giving of himself as best he can.

The universe works on the Law of Compensation. What this means is: “You Will Reap What You Sow”. If you plant seeds of fear, doubt, or poison, then that is what you will experience, however if you constantly plant seeds of joy, love and light, you will enjoy a wonderful life. We all know this saying, “What goes around comes around”. This means when you give you will get a return and it will be greater than what you gave. There is just one thing to keep in mind; your return will not come from the person who received your gift. Unconditional giving means you do not expect a return from that person, but the laws of nature are such that you will get a return. This return will be similar, but greater than what you gave. So give wisely, sincerely, and with joy in your heart, and unexpectedly you will be paid back.

When given with love, the giver truly does receive more than the recipient of the gift. So give with joy and Put Your Health in Your Own Hands.

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